Iowa: Waving Goodbye to Noah Fant

When Alexander Hamilton Swan decided to establish a stockyards operation just South of Omaha in the late 1880’s, he had no idea it would create the greatest Nebraskan’s to ever live. The meatpacking industry drew thousands of European immigrants looking for work and they immediately created their own territories throughout South Omaha. FGI’s roots are firmly entrenched in South Omaha. All but one of our founding fathers attended Omaha South High school and most of us managed to graduate as part of the illustrious class of 1992.

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South Omaha may be best known for the stockyards and meatpacking plants, but the community has also produced several transcendent athletes over the years. I know when you hear transcendent South Omaha athletes your mind automatically goes to Spring Lake Football League (SFL) Hall of Famers; however, I am speaking of actual athletes that played at the highest level and made history.

During the mid-1960’s the gifted signal caller Marlin Briscoe dazzled Packer fans and befuddled opposing defenses earning him the nickname the “Magician”.  Marlin was drafted by the Broncos in the 14th round of the NFL draft in 1968. The Omaha South and Omaha University standout entered a September 1968 game with Boston at quarterback with about 10 minutes to play. He started under center the next week. In doing so, he became the first black starting quarterback in modern pro football history. established a Denver rookie record of 14 touchdown passes that season.

Every self-respecting Husker fan is familiar with Dave Rimington. A 1978 Omaha South Graduate who went on to become a consensus All-American, finishing fifth in Heisman Trophy voting in 1982. Dave is considered the greatest college football center of all time and is who the Rimington award is named after and is awarded the best center in college football on an annual basis.

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Noah Fant seemed destined to be the next great athlete from Omaha South. A talented two sport athlete that shined brightly on a Packer football team often overmatched against Metro powerhouses. In 2015 Noah’s pass catching ability and overall athleticism caught the eye of Division 1 coaches. Most Husker fans felt Noah signing with Nebraska was a foregone conclusion. Unfortunately for us fans, Nebraska was under the control of the Pelini regime. Noah made it clear during the recruiting process that he desired to play offense. The only explanation I can give is Carl Pelini made a cocaine binge induced argument to Bo to recruit Fant as a defensive end. Bo was subsequently fired, Riley’s sprinkles for everyone plea didn’t work, and Noah signed with the enemy!

Although it felt like Noah committed an act of treason signing with Iowa, as a fellow South High graduate I wanted him to succeed. And succeed he did! Fant saw the field as a true freshman hauling in 9 passes for 70 yards and a touchdown. In his sophomore season Noah put the Big 10 and the rest of the country on notice. Fant finished 2017 with 30 catches for 494 yards and 11 touchdowns including a beatdown of his home state Huskers.

A preseason All American in 2018, Noah seemed destined to join Tim Dwight and Brad Banks on the Mount Rushmore of Iowa football. Fant’s and Iowa’s season started off well… maybe too well. Another soft schedule led to a 6-1 start and had Hawkeye fans ready to use their Super 8 rewards points in Indianapolis. You could see Ferentz was troubled. Whenever Iowa managed to move inside of the opponents 40-yard line, Kirk would hear a voice inside his head, “Go for it Kirk”, “but it’s 4th and 2 on the 38!” “You have Noah Fant, the best tight end in the country GO FOR IT!” “I can’t!” Kirk screamed, drawing strange looks from his assistant coaches. “It’s not the Iowa way.”

Kirk had to figure this out. He sought the counsel of legendary Iowa coach Hayden Fry looking for answers. “Why am I having these naughty thoughts?” he asked. “Biscuits and Gravy” replied the now 89-year-old Fry. Kirk left the meeting even more perplexed and confused than before. Upon returning to Iowa City, Kirk set up shop in the team’s film room hoping to find answers. He poured over hours of film starting with the first game. Everything seemed normal at first. An unimaginative and archaic offense for the most part. But one player began to emerge. An incredibly athletic tight end that “specialized” in beating opposing defenses and catching 50-yard touchdown passes. Game after game Noah found his way to the end zone. Kirk heard it again, “that’s him idiot!” “throw Fant the ball!”

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An immense sense of relief washed over Kirk as he exited the facility. “I now know what needs to be done.” He said to himself. Iowa was still clinging to hopes of winning the Big 10 West when they took on Northwestern at home last week.  This is when Ferentz would implement his plan. The plan went off without a hitch! Iowa punted on 4th down from the Northwestern 38, Fant only played 9 snaps in the second half and had 1 catch for 0 yards! The Wildcats went on to win 14-10 and celebrated a Big 10 West Championship on the Iowa 50-yard line.

Even though Ferentz was satisfied, Hawkeye fan was less than satisfied. May took to Twitter to voice their displeasure. “Fire Ferentz!” “Why didn’t Fant play more?” the fans demanded. A few fans drunk from years of Iowa mediocrity offered up this reason. His blocking isn’t up to the “Iowa Standard”. A quick check of the stats shows Iowa is currently 11th in the Big 10 in rushing average a mere 1 yard more than Rutgers for 12th. It seems Iowa isn’t up to the Iowa standard.

I have a few sources close to the program that tell me Fant has been admitted to the Iowa Children’s Hospital near the stadium to see a “specialist”. Noah will be forced to attend daily sessions lasting one hour and retrained in the Iowa Way. It is unknown how long Fant will remain admitted but there is a plan to have the crowd wave to a dejected Noah Fant staring out of the hospital window after a punt from inside of the Husker 40 during the Nebraska game.

Iowa: Swiping Left on Excellence

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A chilly fall Saturday during college football season. The chili’s in the crockpot, the coffee is poured, and you are strapping in for an 11 o’clock kickoff between Iowa and Rutgers with Beth Mowins on the call. A slate gray sky producing a light drizzle as 29,000 faithful watch their beloved Hawkeyes.

It’s late in the third quarter with Iowa clinging to a 10-7 lead. A series of unimaginative play calls has Iowa staring at 4th and 2 from the Rutgers 34 yard line. Without the slightest hesitation Kirk sends out the punt team. The sparse crowd goes wild, showering the field with dollar bills as a raucous cheer of “one more year!”echoes through out the half empty stadium. Iowa will find a way to scratch out this win in route to wrapping up another 7-5 season prompting a four-year contract extension for Kirk.

Fast forward to the present. I’m driving on Interstate 80 to a friends house in Waukee Iowa just after 11 AM listening to the Husker pregame show on AM 590 radio. Initially, I wanted to write a heart warming story about the Hawkeye fans waving to the kids at the Children’s Hospital during their home games, but the deeper I drove into enemy territory the more this thought entered my head. The Hawkeye football program reminds me of whenever I open my Tinder app in the greater Des Moines area. As each potential candidate pops up, I find myself constantly dipping my head to the side saying “ehh” Not bad but not great either. Basically, if 7-5 was a state it would be Iowa.

Let me paint you a picture. It’s late Friday night in Waukee, I am finishing off a 12 pack of Busch light from Casey’s, and begin scrolling through Tinder. Through squinted eyes and an elevated blood alcohol content I swipe right on this 36 year-old from Fort Dodge. Boom it’s a match! After a series of what do you like to do for fun messages spanning 2 days, you decide to meet at Applebee’s for happy hour drinks and endless appetizers.

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We agree to meet at 8 so I throw on some Buckle jeans with a button down and head out. I’m still a little giddy after watching Nebraska get Coach Frost his first win so I decide to arrive a little early. The hostess seats me where I can watch the Purdue vs Ohio State game when I see Deborah walk in sporting a Hawkeyes sweat shirt. After shaking my head and muttering “Christ”, I walk over to greet her as a true Nebraska man would.

The meal was less than memorable as you would expect from Applebee’s but they did have a beer they called Hawktoberfest that intrigued me. I inquired about the taste and the waitress said, “ehh, it’s not bad.” Even their beer is 7-5. The dinner conversation between Deborah and I is going pretty well. She’s throwing out some over the top sexual innuendos and invites me back to her place.

It’s about a 15 minute drive to her 3 bedroom ranch which allowed me to catch a few minutes of Big Red Overreaction. By the way, I am a complete gentleman and this is something I never do. Deborah and I settle in on the couch and after a few minutes of discussing how great I think Adrian Martinez will be, Deborah leans in for a kiss. Even though it’s not in my nature to move this fast, I meet her half-way for a sensual locking of the lips.

I feel a slight tingle and say to myself, “It’s 4th and 2 and you are in scoring position.” I was born and raised in Nebraska, lived through the Husker glory years, and am accustomed to greatness. We play with no fear of failure and take chances. I’m definitely going for it! However, Deborah is from Iowa. She grew up with empty trophy cases and years of mediocrity. It’s 4th and 2 for Deborah and without hesitation she punts. We end up watching Double Impact on Netflix and I leave with a hug and thanks for dinner.

The moral of the story is this. Iowa football will always swipe left on a chance at greatness.